EMERGENCY! [IN COLOR!]

Okay, so to say karma gets you every time would be silly, but it does. Remember the last blog about that whole food getting stuck in the gullet thing? Well, it turns out that it was because of a medical condition that I didn't know about. Here's the story:

At 5:15 AM on July 5 (Kenny & Jill's anniversary), I woke up out of bed with terrible pain in my side and my right arm. I was very short of breath and was basically in misery. I tried going to the bathroom (gas pain? Nope), I tried drinking (something stuck? Nope), and eventually called Anita at 6 or 7 AM. She said I better call the Dr. but I didn't think I would survive until an appointment could be made. I called 911 and ordered an ambulance. Anita had a friend drive her to my house (remember I had gone back to work half days). After a few minutes the Marshalltown Medical and Surgical Center ambulance arrived, along with a rescue truck, and several other vehicles. All I know is there were an awful lot of people in my house. The EMT gave me an EKG right in my bedroom. Then they got me on the stretcher and dragged my ass out to the truck. On the way to the hospital the EMT treated me for a heart attack which included: a nebulizer treatment, 4 aspirins (which I had to chew and swallow - ACK!), and nitro-glycerin spray under my tongue (which gave me a headache). At the ER, the Dr. came in and looked at me. After finding out that I had recently had the gastric bypass, I convinced him that he should probably call Dr. Kermode in Grinnell. He agreed.

They took 4 x-rays of me and then sent me back to the ambulance to take a nice, soothing ride (NOT) to GRMC. It was a terrible 35 minutes. Once I arrived at the GRMC ER, Dr. K came in and asked what the heck I was doing? I told him I didn't know, but whatever it was was surely his fault. He looked at my x-rays and knew right away what the problem was. I had a perforated ulcer in the top of the little pouch that was now my stomach. So food and liquid were leaking out into my body. Because of this, air had gotten under my diaphragm which was causing all the pain. He said they would have to operate again and 15 minutes later I was in the OR!!

It went pretty quickly, and once I was in ICU and had some morphine I felt a little better. I mean I felt better that I was in good hands. They told me they had fixed the perforation and were going to treat me for the ulcer which was caused by helicobacter pylori - a kind of bacteria that exists in 60% of the population and is a main cause of peptic ulcers and even cancers.

Anyway, those ICU nurses are still the best nurses on the planet. I just loved them. I also found out that I had to get up that night, walk, and sit in the chair. Not too much fun, but I was able to rest. I also made the discovery that I had another JP bag and a G-tube. Now, a G-tube is a rubber hose that goes into your belly and usually into your stomach. Well, mine went into my OLD stomach (that's right, I'm just like a cow because I have all these stomachs). I asked about it and the nurse on surgical told me it was going to be used to FEED ME since they didn't know when I would be able to eat or drink anything through my MOUTH. This was a little upsetting to me because I didn't know how long it would take, and I just didn't like the idea of being fed through a tube.

So began the Hospital Chronicles Part II. The first installment of which will be coming soon. It starts on the second day in the hospital when I was moved from my safe haven of ICU to the surgical floor, or as I called it, the geriatric ward.